Monday, November 23, 2009


My boy.
Jude Aukerman Grover.
I am so excited about him and am joyfully anticipating the day when he is placed into my arms.
My belly is growing, as are the aches and pains, but my heart is what is growing the most. My love for this little guy seems to be more real as the days speed on...closer to meeting him. It is real. He is real. He is alive and he is healthy:)

More now than ever do I just want to BE. I want to BE still. BE joyful. BE generous. BE loving. Be happy. BE content. BE a mom....and BE a confident child of God. I want to work out my salvation on a daily basis....seeking God for what that means and what that looks like in my life. I want to sit and teach Adi and Jude what that means in their lives as they grow and become more mature. I want to help shape their lives for the purposes that God has for them. I want to show them what good gifts our father in heaven lavishes on us.
Speaking of good gifts.....
Luke and I just came out of a very demanding three week journey in our parenting travels. As I have said before, once you get the hang of one stage, the sweet little ones change things up on you! Well this challenge left me feeling completely and utterly helpless and feeling inadequate as a mother. Adi went through a three week stage of fighting going to the bathroom. It started after she had a painful BM one evening. She decided in her mind right then that she was not going to go to the bathroom again until she was an adult. Her personality started to change as she became consumed inside herself trying to hold it all in. She couldn't concentrate, couldn't play, couldn't barely hold a normal conversation, couldn't eat....and wouldn't poop.
Every other night became a fight as we made her go to the bathroom. Often times having to use an enema or medicine so that she couldn't stop it. She would go on the floor, in her underwear, anywhere but on the toilet. Luke and I, we begged God for healing for her. We begged God to help her to go poop. We begged Him to relieve her fear. We prayed over her constantly. Prayed over her bedroom and the bathroom. We researched this issue on the Internet and found that it happens often around this age when new things are happening (like a brother or sister being born), or after a terribly painful BM. I finally decided to take Adi to the doctor, as they told me on the phone to bring her in if it lasted longer than three weeks. The doctor told me that this could last for up to 6 months, but that I just had to be persistent with encouraging her to use the toilet, and giving her mirolax to aide in the process. I left the doctors visit a bit frustrated and discouraged, as I was hoping that there was a "miracle drug" that would fix her right up!

God was definitely teaching me patience!
In the evening after our doctors appointment, Adi got down from the dinner table and said "mommy, I have a tummy ache, I have to go poop." And what do you MIRACLE happened! As quickly as her fear set in, that evening it left. The Lord healed her of this fear that had consumed her for 3 weeks.
I praised her that night. I jumped for joy for her. The burden on my heart was released and all I could do was say "THANK YOU JESUS. THANK YOU JESUS!" for healing my girl. And as I cried this out to the Lord, Adi sat there in the bath singing "I've got peace like a river, I've got peace like a river in my soul."
What a good God I serve. His love is more faithful than the morning...and His gifts are mighty good. I praise Him for my baby boy, and for my big girl, and for blessing me with more than I could ever deserve.

May my actions each day reflect the gratitude in my heart for the One who created me.



aww. Poor sweet Adi! So glad she is feeling better! Thanks, once again for your words..they always seem to be just what I need to hear at just the right time..I think you should write a book..seriously.:) Can't wait to "meet" Mr. Jude! :)

Every perfect gift comes from above, from the Father of lights, from the Lord of love, this joy that I have, that I'm singing of is from the Lord, that's where my JOY comes from...your post made me think of this old song.:) Praying for you....

Becky said...

When did you find out you were having a boy?! I missed this information and was quite surprised when I read your post this morning! Congratulations!

Take heart... said...

Can't wait to see you again.

cathy Boyd said...

Yes.. you left out a very big part of this story. How you felt when you found out that Ava June had become Jude. :) just want to hear that story.